


careful what you wish for

by oceanknives



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Headcanon, Spirit!Lapin, in which the sugar plum fairy created him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:40:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25267750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oceanknives/pseuds/oceanknives
Summary: Lapin doesn't remember the time before, because there was no time before.Or, the one where Lapin is a spirit created by the Sugar Plum Fairy.
Comments: 10
Kudos: 39





	careful what you wish for

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, listen. This is purely a headcanon and it is barely backed by canon, but I think Lapin should have been wished into existence by the Sugar Plum Fairy, and I think he should come back as a bitter chocolate spirit to kill her. I'm posting this before the battle against her because I don't want to be clowned on TOO hard. 
> 
> Enjoy my nonsense <3

Lapin doesn't remember the time before, because there was no time before. There was only this : purple light, the feeling of eyes opening, the knowledge of sweetness, and shackles. Wings, too many, eyes, too many, wishes, too many. Patron, one.

* * *

The whole flesh thing takes some time getting used to. The world feels too big for how small his body is, and he wishes the Sugar Plum Fairy had made him with wings.

The stone circle anchors him to the ground. Lapin learns what touch feels like with peppermint trees, and he learns what pain feels like with the Sugar Plum Fairy's words.

"Go, my little bunny."

"Worship their Bulb."

"Guard my name."

He has no choice.

* * *

It is easy to lie when you were born old. It is easy to become a Primogen when you were born with a purpose. Repackage a body and call it yours. Repackage a mission and call it faith. Easy.

Word spreads fast - of the bunny who seemed to have come out of nowhere, and yet performed miracles like the Bulb itself lived in his hands. 

Magic, too, spreads fast, but people don't know that.

Lapin learns what success feels like, and the shackles loosen.

* * *

It is easy to become a teacher when you were born with knowledge. Or, at least, that's what she had told him.

He can almost feel himself disappear when the twins look away. His hands close on nothing, lavender at the edge of his vision. Magic keeps him together like stitches. What was he saying ?

Theo's voice brings him back to the world. When Lapin notices the twins are gone, he first thinks, are they spirits too ?

Lapin learns what difficulty feels like, and the shackles tighten.

* * *

The words slip from his mouth before he can really think about them.

"Where is your bulb now ?"

Sir Keradin looks at him like he wants to tear him apart, and Lapin feels more real than he ever has been. The eyes follow him way beyond the cell, as do the screams, and the magic at the edge of his vision does not feel threatening anymore.

Lapin learns what victory feels like, and he thinks he can take off the shackles himself.

* * *

This is why Pride is a sin.

* * *

Lapin learns what death feels like when the mace catches him in the ribs. He feels them snapping like sugar, or paper, whatever it should be. There is blood, and it is his, and it feels wrong. Are wishes supposed to bleed ?

When the Sugar Plum Fairy takes his face between her claws - hands ? - Lapin feels the rest of him snapping. Wishes aren't supposed to bleed, but they are supposed to disappear.

When she says the word "home," Lapin feels the shackles fall with him, and he realises they were what made him real.

When the cathedral is cleaned of the unholy carnage, no one notices if Lapin's body seems to rest at odd angles, or or if it goes through people's fingers.

* * *

It goes through their mind, too.

* * *

Lapin wonders, sometimes, if he missed out on youth. His bones were made aching - but, after all, aren't most things ? 

He wonders, too, if the Sugar Plum Fairy made him this way because it is all she knows. Power and deception.

He thinks of the Princesses and the way they ran away from his lessons. He thinks of Liam breaking the teacup. He thinks of the carelessness of children, and again, wonders : was I wished to be old, or was I wished to be obedient ? 

He thinks of the Princess, Bastard, now singular - news travel fast. He thinks of Liam sending Preston away - pigs are a little bit like teacups. He thinks of the weight death holds on people, and again, wonders : was I wished to be old, or was I wished to be grieving ?

The answers scare him, but alas, he only has time to think about answers, these days.

* * *

There is no realm for Lapin. There never was, really.  _ Easily discarded. _ He was never really alive, only imagined, so why would death be considering ?

Things around him fade. The very world forgets it has to hold him, and his body does, too. He who had lived in smoke becomes it, and he feels himself slip through the cracks - of everything.

His mind, too, seems to slip. Was there always this anger in him ? Did bitterness always live at the edge of his throat ?

It's quite unfair, really. Lapin has the answer, now, and the answer is that he was wished to be old because all good weapons are, and the answer makes what is left of his throat hurt.

Who forges their weapon with a conscience ?

* * *

The spirit doesn't remember the time before, because death has consequences. There is only this : bitter chocolate, the feeling of frosted limbs, the knowledge of freedom, and emptiness. The wings are between its teeth, ripped off. The eyes are clouded. The wishes are forgotten. The faith was never real.

The spirit learns what revenge feels like, and that is all it knows.  
  



End file.
